It’s also very much about power exchange. Most experts won’t tell you they’re “the best” at something, but if you’re dipping your toes into Kink communities as part of your exploration, you’ll likely find more than a few people talking themselves up.īut when it comes to beginner BDSM, it’s primarily about two things: exploring sensation and exploring mind states. It’s best to start simply and really research something before you move forward with something new never assume you know everything about the safety and practice of a particular skill without years of experience never trust someone who tells you they’re an expert unless they’re widely known within the community and can be vetted by multiple people. BDSM often plays on the lines of physical and mental boundaries, testing how far we can push ourselves. BDSM practice should be fully aware of the risks involved, physical and mental, so you don’t accidentally go too far. You should also wrap your mind around concepts of consent: learning how to voice what you want, how you want it, and encourage your partner or partners to do the same. I will say that before you try anything, especially anything that could potentially harm someone if done properly, you should read up on safety. The ways in which you’ll touch on these different aspects of the practice will really depend on what your preferences are. Not everyone who's into being tied up is a masochist, for example. These are the basic philosophies encompassed by BDSM, and they’re things you’ll likely play with at differing amounts and frequencies. It is impossible to cover everything in one blogpost, but you can find a multitude of tips, suggestions, and safety advice all over the internet.īD = Bondage and Domination, D/s = Dominance and submission, and SM = Sadism and Masochism. The sheer variety of dynamics, labyrinthine communities surrounding the practices, and levels of involvement ranging from fuzzy handcuffs in the bedside drawer to lifestyle BDSM and kink… it can be incredibly intimidating to know where to start. Whether your interest was piqued by the infamous 50 Shades of Grey or you’ve always been curious about getting tied up and spanked, the world of BDSM can be an intimidating one to get a start in.
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